We have an appointment on the 18th to talk to my oncologist, MO, to determine our course of action.
He came to see me in the hospital and we talked briefly about my options, pre-pathology return, so we have an idea of what the options will be. I don’t think he knows how to take me – he talks, I listen, ask a few questions and that’s it. I don’t freak out, I don’t cry, I don’t scream. I’m not sure if that’s more of what he is used to or what, but he always seems like he’s trying to figure me out. I kind of like that, I think.
Once we talk to MO, we’re going to sit down and talk to the boys. I am totally dreading that. We’ve been intentionally vague since my diagnosis, but given the pain and the treatments upcoming, we’re going to have to tell them more. DREAD. SUCK. UGH.
My recovery is going…slowly but surely. The mornings start out so well, but by mid-day I’m just sore and tired. It’s frustrating, but I’m staying in bed or on the chair. Now that my surgical scar is healing so well, my previous pain is coming back and that really sucks. But I am continuing to take it easy; I need to be healthy to face the next stage of this.
My fight with melanoma has honestly been fairly easy so far, but it’s becoming painfully obvious that since this surgery wasn’t entirely successful, the road ahead is going to require some serious fight. I’m scared of treatment – mostly of side effects. I know that I’ll be in good hands at UMCCC, but the unknown is always scary.